Grief is a natural reaction to loss and yet people can sometimes be surprised by their feelings following a death. We all process grief differently, but being able to work through your emotions and manage your feelings is an important part of the healing process. There is a wealth of information about the stages of grief and various support resources online for those who prefer to independently explore their options. Many communities also have local groups that may be a good choice if you are looking for in-person support or to meet people who are experiencing similar feelings.
We have collected a few helpful tips for you to remember while working through the grief process yourself and considerations for others who may also be experiencing loss.
Self-Care and Supporting Yourself During Grief
As the airplane safety briefings remind us, you have to secure your own oxygen mask first before you can adequately take care of other people. The same is true when managing grief; you have to ensure your own needs are met while you are managing all of the details that arise after a death. Here are some important things to remember:
Grief is a multifaceted journey marked by a myriad of emotions and physical manifestations. From fatigue to mood swings, it's common to experience a range of reactions following a loss. Embracing these feelings without judgment is essential, recognizing that grieving is a deeply personal process with no predetermined path. While it's natural to feel disconnected or even relieved amidst the sorrow, allowing yourself to experience these emotions fully is a vital part of the healing journey.
Amidst grief, prioritizing self-care becomes paramount. Taking the time to attend to your physical needs—eating well, getting enough rest, and maintaining routines—can provide stability during this turbulent time. Additionally, don't hesitate to seek support from loved ones or professionals. Accepting help with daily tasks and leaning on others for emotional support fosters resilience and aids in the healing process. Remember, asking for assistance is not a sign of weakness but a courageous step toward self-compassion and eventual healing.
Childhood Grief
Children's reactions to death may differ from adults', often displaying a wide array of emotions like depression, guilt, or anger. Encouraging open expression of feelings is crucial, even if some children struggle to articulate them. Tailoring conversations to their developmental stage aids comprehension and processing, while regression behaviors may manifest during times of trauma or loss.
Death is a natural part of life, and experts agree that children, even very young ones, should not be shielded from it. Children have the capacity to understand death as an event and often express curiosity through questions. It’s important to address their inquiries truthfully and simply, using age-appropriate explanations like, “Grandma’s heart got too tired and stopped working, so she died.” Avoid using phrases that could confuse or scare them, such as “Grandma went to sleep” or “God took Grandma,” as these may lead to fears or misunderstandings. Encourage questions without pressure, as younger children may ask about physical or immediate aspects of death, while older ones may explore its finality or deeper meaning. Regardless of age, provide honest, straightforward answers that match their level of understanding.
Online Grief Resources
Highmark Caring Place
The death of a loved one is devastating to a child. The impact can be overwhelming and the children and family often need support. The Highmark Caring Place can provide that support through its various programs.
Experience the power of healing and growth with Everything After. This comprehensive resource center offers a wide range of resources, support groups, and counseling services to help you navigate life after loss. From grief support groups to counseling services, Everything After is dedicated to providing the support you need to find hope and meaning in the aftermath of change.
What’s Your Grief offers online and in-person continuing education training for grief support professionals. Using an accessible approach and a combination of practical and creative tools, we strive to help participants utilize relevant and useful theories, tools, and techniques in their work with people grieving a wide range of losses.
GriefShare is a 13-week support program designed to help individuals who have experienced the loss of a loved one. The program provides a supportive and caring environment for attendees to share their feelings, learn about grief, and find hope and healing. Through group discussion and video seminars, GriefShare offers practical tools and resources to help individuals navigate their grief and find comfort in the aftermath of their loss.
Webhealing.com, the first interactive grief website on the internet, offers discussion boards, articles, book suggestions, and advice for men and women working through every aspect of grief. The site’s founder, Tom Golden LCSW, has provided book excerpts and contact information to help those healing from loss.
The National Hospice and Palliative Care Organization’s website provides a host of information and resources for people facing a life-limiting illness or injury and their caregivers.
